Bisou: With Time Comes Change

On ships, we never expect things to last. Friends leave, assignments end and your memories become a folder on your computer but then someone lasts and it changes everything. It is scary though when something goes from temporary to long-lasting and meeting Julian was not any different. Continue reading

Just Like in Real life, Not the Movies

We walked to his room with sparks between us that could probably be seen from miles away, but I felt the pressure of what might await at saying goodbye. I was away in my own mind when we made it to his door. He took my hands in his and pulled me close. As I snapped out of my head, I could feel his breathing next to my cheek, his face moving to meet mine, our hearts pounding as we locked eyes with each other, an irresistible urge to give in. I said sorry and ran away. Continue reading

When You Walk Alone

Each port I visit, I hope that I have some friends to get off with, to explore, make memories and to just not be alone. This specific contract, however, I have learned the beauty of walking alone. Walking with people is great but when you walk alone something even greater happens. At every stop, at every step, you ask yourself, Am I standing where I hoped I would be? Continue reading

The Pauses in Traveling

As I sit in my bedroom waiting for my next ship contract to begin, I realize I am surrounded by things that I don’t need, I know my mom has told me countless times, but it is not until you understand that you live a happy life out of a suitcase 8 months out of the year, that you ask yourself. do I really need it all? Continue reading

Only Human

This song plays in the background as I am writing, only human, and I think that sometimes on-board ships you are expected to have this perfect image. This image has to hold in front of guests, co-workers, and sometimes even those you consider close. The thing is that I have realized that I have also come to expect that perfect image of myself, but I am nowhere near perfect. Continue reading

Beauty and the Beast

Fairy tales have been a part of my life as long as I can remember, but I only ever felt a connection to Belle because she liked to read books like me. Yesterday, I found myself in France, not particularly in the city where her story takes place, but one in which mine was coming to an end, Cherbourg. On ships, the routine is the law of the land, but once in a blue moon you find a person who is willing to walk away from it to share time with you. Julian left the ship this morning in between tears and goodbyes clutching a letter that I wrote in his hand, just hours before, however, he was smiling and holding my hand on the way to a surprise picnic he had planned for us in France. Continue reading